Oh My God.

Hi. I know this seems out of context and strange, but I needed to write something. 

For it has just hit me. This, the best year of my life, is all but over.

Some of my best friends have already finished their exams (while I'm still having to do a totally unnecessary group project for my Strategy class, let alone do my exams) and are leaving at the end of the weekend. As I was walking home from a quiet school listening to this beautiful but sad song (below), I felt so emotional. What if life never gets this good again? 

Anyway, now is not the time to waste writing an essay on this blog. I need to go out and make the most of our last weekend together as one big Erasmus group. I just want to say a quick thank you to and goodbye to those who are leaving us this weekend - you have been part of something amazing in my life, and I am truly grateful (and clearly a little too emotional).

We cannot cry though. What stopped me on my walk home? That old phrase 'don't cry because it's over - smile because it happened'.

So let's not waste any more time! Let's go out and party until the sun comes up, reminisce about the good times and enjoy each other's company one more time. 

Rant over

Ollie

Cultured and inspired.

I thought I'd separate French Culture from the others, as it was my favourite class, and deserves its own post (plus the other post with all 6 courses is way too long, even for me!)



French Culture - PROBABILITY OF SLEEP 0.1

Obviously I had to keep French Culture, despite dropping French Language. It is a breath of fresh air, taking me away from the grey business world that I seem to have signed up for and back to the much greener and brighter world of art, poetry, society and culture - and all in French! So I am still learning new French words by attending the classes and reading the literature. I have also picked up my copy of Harry Potter et le Prince de Sang-Mélé from Wales to read and improve my French with a familiar story, What is interesting is that the French have a special past-historic tense used when telling stories, unlike in English, which merely uses the perfect tense. That's standard of the French, making everything more complicated than necessary. Anyway, I digress....

In Saint Anne with Arsène, Thibault and Katie

Arsène is my favourite teacher at the school. He's crazy, merry, resembles Bilbo Baggins in the Lord of the Rings, and is totally out of place at a business school! He brings out my creative side and humour, and making jokes in French is always fun! I have also become a lot better at understanding his native French. He is extremely well-read and well-spoken. I am very glad that I didn't drop his class.

I was originally planning on completing the essay in French, to help improve my ability in the language. However, due to the busyness of the month of March, I did not really have time and chickened out, settling for French captions of my photos. You see, my vocabulary was very specialised, being a review of the French rugby team's Six Nations campaign. I thought my sheer cheek in rubbing in the Welsh Grand Slam would be appreciated by the Jolly Frenchman!

However, I have already completed this exam (last Monday), and I answered in French! I was so happy with myself - despite the grammar being most likely rubbish, I thought "hey, I have nothing to lose - let's try it!" I wrote 7 pages in a foreign language in 2 hours. Yes it's about quality over quantity, but hey if you can't have one go for the other!

I also met up with Arsène outside class, when my Belgian friend Thibault, who sadly could only be here for the first semester, came to visit for Easter. He, (Irish) Katie and I went for coffee with Arsène on Easter Monday morning, where we discussed culture, adventures, meeting people.... all really cheesy and motivating! It was at that point too, where I was inspired to start writing poetry again, something I haven't done since I was 17.

For the last class last Wednesday, after the exam, the German girls and I had an extra lesson to equal the classes the other students had received in January before our program had begun. There, we recited and discussed Paroles by Jacques Prévert, a classic collection, or receuil of French poetry. It was masterfully written. My personal favourite is a love poem - Paris at Night, which I beat three of my classmates to reciting:

Trois allumettes une à une allumées dans la nuit

La première pour voir ton visage tout entier

La seconde pour voir tes yeux

La dernière pour voir ta bouche

Et l'obscurité tout entière pour me rappeler tout cela

En te serrant dans mes bras

I am staying in contact with Arsène to discuss poetry and writing. I met up with him briefly the morning after our last class to recite to him a piece that I wrote at seventeen, which he enjoyed. I'm looking forward to reading his material and learning from a published writer, as well as an unlikely friend as well as teacher.

So, as you can see, I really enjoyed this class. Sometimes the French can get heavy, but Arsene's seamless guidance of the small class through the material keeps the class interesting and fulfilling. PoS - 0.1


There you have it - a class that has not only taken me away from the world we know with language and poetry and culture, but it has paradoxically brought me back down to Earth by showing me maybe the direction I should be following - after all, I'm not truly passionate about business - it's just my degree.

What I really enjoy lies outside the harsh business world. It's about writing, about meeting people with backgrounds completely different from your own, about seeing the world. I cannot be confined to the office. I do not know yet how I will get to do this for a living - but soon enough, once I manage to end my close friendship with Procrastination Jones, I will find a way.

So with that inspiration, Merci Arsène!


Rant over

Ollie

Let's get down to business...

Okay now the blog is up and running again, I need to continue my week of playing catch-up that I kinda abandoned and failed to maintain on the very first day. Today, I shall review the classes this semester, of course with my Probability of Sleep rating included! To highlight how long it has been since I've updated this blog, I only have one class left this Tuesday, and then I shall never have a lesson in ESC Rennes again!

I would apologise to those who find the prospect of reading about my classes extremely boring and dull, but they would have probably closed this page by now. In that case, you're an impatient douchebag - have some faith in me! I need to write this, for myself if no one else, to help me with my portfolio that I have to submit for my own university. But of course, I will try to make it as interesting as possible for everyone, not just business students. 

So because I'm a lazy bastard, I decided to take one class fewer this semester. I said goodbye to French Language, after finding it a perte de temps (for more information about this, including a kick-ass economics-style graph, see my post of December 11th, 'Good Times'http://welcometoolliewood.blogspot.fr/2011/12/good-times.html). So this term I am taking six instead of seven classes, which is still more than I would do at Warwick. Apart from my apathy, my reasons for reducing the workload included the (correct) expectation that my term would be disturbed by trips to the UK for internship-related reasons and the possibility of having more time to focus on other pursuits and further immersion into Rennes life. That one didn't happen though - I just slept more. 

Some will be thinking "Only 25 ECTS? What a lazy so-and-so!" Well, FYI, if you consider that as my credits will not be transferred or count in any way, shape or form towards my degree (apart from a fail possibly hindering my portfolio mark), doing this many classes 'for the craic' (I love that phrase, thanks Ireland!) is rather admirable....... No? Okay then...

But I've found out that due to the comparative lack of international students this term, the number of groups for French language has halved from 12 to 6, and the top three groups study French Culture in the native language. This reshuffling has meant that Matt and the Irish girls have now joined me in undertaking the module in French, as they have basically stayed in group 4or 5, but now it is out of 6 rather than 12 - meaning a much higher level for them. 

But was it? Well, in their French Language classes, one of the most advanced groups, they do wordsearches. I talked to Elena, a really kind and sweet Spanish girl who was in Group 11 with me last semester, about what they do in group 6. It really does not sound anything like the level it was last term! So it seems I'm not missing out on anything in particular, so surely that justifies my not taking the class this term..........No? Okay then...

So what courses did I do? Let's check out the business ones here - French Culture deserves its own post.

Strategic Human Resource Management - PROBABILITY OF SLEEP 0.8

Again, the HR course has turned out to be among the most problematic of my courses this semester, but for completely different reasons from that of last term's. For starters the teacher was way more likeable. Patricia Sharpley, unlike Mohammed Ali Sharifijan, is open to the views and opinions of her students, gives clear lectures with well-thought out cases, and does not support the firing of an employee for using the Internet for personal use in his lunch break (well I assume - I never asked her about that).

However, my problem with this module is not in its instruction, but its administration. The assessment for this module is not by exam, unlike every single other class I have done here (group project/individual essay and exam). Instead, we have to each interview an HR manager and compile a report based on the findings of the interview. THIS IS OUR EXAM!

How the hell can I take this course seriously? We are not being examined on the course material that has been highly repeated from the last HR course, but instead our ability to pass this course depends on our ability to a) find an HR manager b) find one that is willing to be interviewed and c) is willing to divulge company information to a complete stranger. Yippee...

Now what if you have NO connections to any HR managers, and haven't worked anywhere corporate? How the hell am I going to find one? Not only that, if you actually manage to find an HR manager who is not way too busy to spend an hour talking to you - can I add how unlikely this is too, as small business don't even have an HR manager, and those companies large enough to have one will not have one that is easily accessible to interview kids - but even if, say, you DID find one - how can you be sure that the info you're getting is true and reliable? There's so much politics in management it's ridiculous. The HR managers will be as transparent as a log.....dipped in oil.

So, as you can see, I cannot take this course seriously with such a stupid method of assessment, which does not test our comprehension of the material given, which is virtually exactly the same as the last semester (hence the high sleep probability). Not impressed, ESC Rennes. Not at all....

BUT I have found a possible solution. Apart from me working with a friend to interview his boss, I have another idea for an essay that may be beautiful if done well. So I shall write it and upload it on this blog when it is finished. (Bet you can't wait can you!)

So repeated material and stupid assessment measures mean a class for which I cannot be motivated. PoS - 0.8


Strategic Management Fundamentals - PROBABILITY OF SLEEP 0.6


Ah the mixed bag of chocolates and turds that is our strategy class. How good is this class? Well, it depends on the mood of our professor. Now don't get me wrong, if I had written this post on time, I probably would be saying something totally different. The course is possibly the best of the ones we are doing this semester - a fantastic mix of the academic theory and its practical implications.

I had never taken a specific class in strategy before, apart from a marketing and strategy class in my first year that combined the two in the same module. Now, I find it extremely interesting: how to position your business to achieve competitive advantage and maximum profits (rents). The first case study was clever too, almost like a puzzle for us to solve.

Michael Porter: making business
unnecessarily academic since 1979

The teacher, a French dude, is very passionate about his subject, and clearly has high ambitions for us. He is teaching us way beyond the 'fundamentals'. However, he is easily irritated and this week, even decided to leave the class half way through after our alleged noise and use of phones was too much to bear for him, when actually we were the quietest we had ever been! What was worse was he was teaching us all about the Resource-Based View, so any business students reading this will know how important that class would have been. He just gave us another case study to do and left!

Now we have to try to decipher the Chinese encrypted in the Strategic Management Journal all by ourselves. The teacher effectively drove us to the desert of RBV theory, guiding us on his way, dropping us off in the desert. Then he leapt back in the bus, closed the door and accelerated away, leaving us searching for the oasis that is an online article summary for dummies.... I need to stop with these extended metaphors, don't I...

But apart from that little hiccup that has made the class rather difficult, I am very happy with the class. I've learned loads, and as long as our bipolar Breton isn't too belligerent, the class is very pleasant - all fine and dandy. The fairly high PoS rating of 0.6 is because of the articles really - the class is quite enthralling.



Digital Marketing - PROBABILITY OF SLEEP 0.1


Okay. Quite simply - I love this course. It has changed my view of marketing, highlighting the importance of technology. Business and technology go hand-in-hand. The project was so much fun too - we had to design a marketing plan for a digital venture - either one that exists already or a start-up. Due to being in a group with really cool people, our idea was rather musical, and it would be cool to actually try to make it a reality (our teacher, Steve Sanazaro from Texas, was very keen on our idea!)

The logo for our 'startup' idea.

Some in my class complained that there wasn't much substance to the class, because there wasn't much that could be on the exam. I totally disagree - the videos and practical advice from the experienced teacher is far more useful than anything that could be examined. We'll forget what we crammed for the exam the day after. What you remember is the stuff that's practical and hits home - our teacher knew that, and so I thank him for making his class so much more interesting than the general useless drivel that we are made to learn at business school.

PoS - 0.1, It was 8.15am on a Tuesday. You can't rule out the possibility of a snooze.


Business to Business (B2B) Marketing - PROBABILITY OF SLEEP 0


After missing the first class due to the most epic hangover of my life after a brutal and messy Open Bar, I quickly regretted that decision. For this class was taught by who I like to call Lord Baldemort. Apart from being folically challenged, he is also pedantic to the point of pain. He does not use slides - he dictates notes, and asks us to fill the gaps in. Don't get me wrong, this is a fantastic teaching method, encouraging us to work out certain things for ourselves (often comparisons between business-to-business and business-to-consumer marketing). However, he is rather patronising when we don't get it right (which is often the case - we haven't learnt this before!).

So after scrounging a group together with fellow absentees from the first class, I chose the professional services sector for the project (thought I'd kill two birds with one stone, as I still had open applications for PwC and Deloitte). Of course, this soon turned out to be a mistake, with no business-to-consumer market to compare to, and as the first to present our findings, we took quite a beating from Baldemort, the Cruciatus curse of his criticism curdling my blood.

I chose to use the first film Voldy because it looks an awful lot more like our teacher.

So I found myself writing the report feeling like my life depended on it, or the alopecic demon would send me to Hell with a flash of green light. But despite his relentless patronising and overpowering ego (he's one of those few Brits who have mastered French, and he ain't afraid to show it - bilingual and he knows it), he's actually rather likeable due to his cheek, and unlike the HR teacher from the previous semester, his stubbornness in his opinions is justified with clear knowledge and experience.

But it was an interesting class, and I wouldn't dare dose off for fear of getting attacked. PoS - 0.


Applied Marketing Research - PROBABILITY OF SLEEP 0.9


Finally, there was the Applied Marketing Research shambles - I MEAN class. I honestly don't know what I was supposed to learn from it. It did not start off particularly well, with a French teacher who, despite his charm, was rather annoying with his use of examples in French and even Portuguese. This is meant to be taught in English, hello?

My work in class: creating a meme of my teacher
using Word and Shapes

But then it got worse. Much worse. At least we kind of understood what we needed to do for the focus group assignment (ze fuck us groop). Then came the quantitative part, taught by a Chinese woman with incomprehensible English. I mean - she actually cannot communicate well enough to teach a class! We had no clue what she was on about, and if it weren't for my netbook keeping me sane with 9gag.com during those classes, I would most probably have dosed off (Hence PoS- 0.9). She would stop every now and then to ask us "Have you any question?" which usually meant "Be quiet". We were left two days before the due date for the presentation completely clueless as to what we needed to present or do for the project. The class was disappointing, as I had had high expectations for a class that could teach me something Warwick doesn't seem to focus on. The class was one of the main reasons I chose the IBPM courses in the first place, but ah well - it's over now. Just an exam testing God knows what.


Sorry for the delay, but there's the boring course summary over and done with. Some great classes this term, with Digital Marketing and Strategy being very useful, B2B being informative despite me being scared for my life, HR and Marketing Research being on the more useless and unfeasible scale, while French Culture was there to take me away from the gloomy world of business, and make my soul sing with culture and language, but more on that in the next post!



Rant over (Fuck it, I like this sign-off line!)

Ollie

Oops!

Disclaimer: This was meant to be up last night, but the stupid computer couldn't handle the image uploads and took forever to do so. So I fell asleep while waiting, as you do... Ah well, nevermind! Here is yesterday's post!

Wow it feels good to be back writing this blog! I am so sorry (mostly to myself) that it has taken so long to update this. It's just that March has been such an incredibly busy and hectic month, and I don't really know where to begin there! So, in true Ollish fashion, I shall put it off and look to April.

HANG ON A MINUTE! Who are you again?

The delay in updates was taking the piss...

Oh yeah! Firstly, however, I should reintroduce myself and this blog, considering it has been nearly two months since the last installment of my story. I am Ollie Lloyd, a 21 year old Welshman who is studying in Warwick Business School in England. However, after two years of undertaking a strangely over-academic business education that I cannot help but ridicule, I found myself on a ferry across the sea to the city of Rennes in Brittany, France, to 'study' at the local business school ESC Rennes, and learn more about the wonderful world of business.

However, in the seven months I have been here, I have learned far more than I ever thought I could, and this has not just been about marketing, The things I have learned have included how to survive in a foreign land, how to befriend and learn from people from all corners of the world, and why you should not go to an Open Bar the night before your first class with Lord Baldemort (more on that later). 

But most importantly - I have learned about myself. I now know what makes me want to get up every morning (at 12pm of course! I am still a student after all!). I also now have a sense of empowerment that neither Sheepland or Englandland could give me. I have experienced my own renaissance, and boy oh boy does it feel good! I feel that I can achieve anything, that the world is my oyster (it's a cliché expression I know, but when you have befriended and created connections with people from every continent, it kind of makes sense to you!).

Now I am not here to boast, because a) I'm not of that disposition and b) I have nothing to boast about. I am still a lazy idiot who likes to leave his essays until literally the last minute. I still lack the coordination to successfully flip and catch a beer mat without spilling my own pint. I have not found any discernible talent that will make me amazingly rich. No - I just feel more content, and it's all thanks to living in this small dog turd-covered city. 

Reunion with a few of my favourite people, chez moi.

Okay I hope this optimism has successfully set the tone for this post, because it is definitely nothing like my last one. Limbo is long gone. The term has started, and Rennes is buzzing with life once more. Indeed, there are nothing like as many international students as there were last semester, but there are still some great new people. I have also become closer with some who have also been here since September. What I have learned is friends are no different than essays in the sense that it is about quality over quantity. Five friends who you are extremely close with and can do anything together beats having fifty acquaintances. Trust me, I know!

Seems like you have a LOT to catch up on!

You're absolutely right, strange schizophrenic sub-heading! It shames me to say, but over half the second semester has passed, so I have an appalling amount of writing to do to bring the story up to date. The amount I need to talk about has grown exponentially like a snowball gathering snow as it rolls down a mountainside: and finally getting round to writing it down has become increasingly difficult as the task has grown. With March being so busy there was no time for me to set aside to finally get an update online. April, however, has brought me time. Lots of time. 

So you can expect a blog post every day this week. We're going to do a lucky magical number seven. Seven days in a week, seven deadly sins, seven wonders of the world, seven Horcruxes, seven dwarfs, seven members of S Club 7....okay I'm going off the point. Basically seven posts for the first seven days of April - and it will cover everything.

Day 1: April and its significance.

Day 2: The classes this term.

Day 3: Life in general - fun and friends.

Day 4: You can't go to France for a year without a visit to Paris!

Day 5: Why next year won't be too bad after all.

Day 6: Why my internship hunt is finally over.

Day 7: I finally outline the rest of Ollie and Sitzel's Great European January Adventure! 

Hopefully that should get everything back on track! Then we can forget this ever happened and move on with our lives....

So where are we on this list today? Oh what a surprise - the first post!

APRIL AND ITS SIGNIFICANCE, by Oliver R. Lloyd III. 

So why is this upcoming month so important? Simple - because it's the last.

Yes, I'm afraid so. It really has come around that quickly, and I really have missed out on a big chunk of the year in my blogging. Day-to-day life as a student in ESC Rennes as we know it will end with the month of April, as those on the undergraduate transfer programme finish their year then, and leave promptly to save themselves the expense of another month's rent. Among these people will be some of my best friends here: Matt the Englishman, Rob the Cypriot, the Irish girls and others! The Masters students will also finish this month, leaving Rennes a much quieter place.

As for us, the students on the IBPM scheme, our exams annoyingly finish on the 7th May, necessitating an extra month of rent. Many will leave that week, including my favourite Mexican Itzel, so they will not be staying much longer than those leaving in April, and the extra time will mostly be spent studying for the exams.

Me? I will be staying in Rennes a little longer to work for the ESC Admissibles team. I heard about this opportunity from Katie, with whom I will be undertaking the placement. Basically, we are welcoming the new students to Rennes who are due to start the Grande Ecole programme this year. We will cater for them and partying is compulsory, and for this clearly difficult and stressful job we will be renumerated considerably. 

A more important consequence, however, is that finally I will have some continuity. I can stay in Rennes now for another three months STRAIGHT. It won't be lonely after May because a few friends, including the excellent Ecuadorian Simon, are also doing the Admissibles job. 

A McJob in a foreign language can't be that bad...

Furthermore, being in Rennes for three months with no further trips away means that maybe I can find a job here to make the financial side of life here more comfortable. I am actually planning on applying to McDonalds. I had said I'd never work in food again after Pizza Hut, but as this is a job entirely in French, the benefits for my language will add to the money and somewhat mitigate what probably will not be a very enjoyable McJob. Failing that, I could volunteer. Give back to the community of the city that has changed my life, whilst improving my French at the same time.

I am still not fluent in the language, not really anyway. Knowing the linguistic ability of the average Brit, however, I could probably pass as fluent in French compared to others in the UK - but that's not really enough. I still struggle to understand spoken French when babbled at full native speed. It's no good being able to say something in French (albeit poorly) to a native when you cannot understand their response! 

But three months uninterrupted in Rennes should do the trick, especially considering the group projects and classes are coming to an end and all that remains is exam revision. This means I have more time to focus on becoming courant on an international level, not just for a Breeteesh guy. Increased watching of French TV and movies is in order, I think! I may also look at doing the DALF, the French equivalent of the TOEFL for English, to officially confirm my fluency. It depends on the cost of course. 

Anyway, with this listing of objectives, strategy and tactics I'm starting to sound like a marketing plan! The point is - I have been blessed with two extra months in France, and I plan to use them! 

For the rest of this month, however, I have another priority: to make the most of this last month with everyone still here. The weather has improved, and we have spent time in the park in shorts and T-shirts - and I imagine there will be more of that, but also anything we haven't done yet, such as trips to local places like Dinard, St Malo and Vannes, needs to be checked off the list, as well as the things we know we enjoy. Basically, we need to do whatever it takes to spend quality time together as a kick-ass cosmopolitan group!

The view of St Malo from my ferry back to the UK 

It will be an emotional month, probably even more so than December, but it will be great too! Like I said at the beginning, living in Rennes has been life-changingly (new adverb there) brilliant, so it is only fitting to see it out with a bang! 

So, in homage to my French Culture teacher Arsene*, who exudes jolliness through his love and appreciation of the spoken and written word, I shall finish this post with a short poem of my own. As you can see I'm no Wordsworth or Heaney. This is just a quick message to my peers at ESC Rennes for this upcoming month: 

The challenges that remain,

We shall all surmount.

So don't count these last days,

Make these last days count!

Bonne soirée**

Ollie

*I know there's supposed to be a grave accent on the 'e', but I haven't worked out how to do any accents on my computer apart from é. So please French grammar police, let me off there.

**I still haven't thought of a new sign-off line to replace the often inappropriate 'Rant over', so this will have to do for now! Wishing you a good evening or day comme les Francais font will suffice for now.